oy

Sober, second night in a row.

Uncomfortable as all hell.

Praying the words flow from my head, onto this paper, and not having a lot of faith that they will.

I feel easy to love, easier to hate, easy to make fun of...

and, I'm ok with that? The thing that really bugs me, is that I don't feel easy to forgive. I feel like I forgive almost everything and everyone, all the time, and it doesn't get returned.

I don't really think I am any more volatile than anyone else who has hurt feelings or feels threatened. In fact, I don't really think I am that unique from every other person, at all.

Forgiveness makes civility, which is a comfortable state for all. It doesn't mean that the face of the relationship or situation at hand isn't forever changed, but it does mean that you can coexist...

I am so awake (fucking nap) hungry and...just stirred up like a mother fucker.

"look at this motha fucka!"

I don't like being alone. In the relationship sense, that's fine, but not in a physical sense. That's why I have a bazillion friends and spend 90% of my time on people's couches. It's why I spend so much time on the computer and text like crazy.

I am logging off now, but it isn't goodnight...

I'm texting.