ok ok, let's keep it real

When I left Daniel 3 years ago, I looked into his eyes, bawling and told him that I would regret leaving him until the day I died.

Because I knew no one would ever look at me with those eyes again. Or love me the way he did. And to this day, I haven't found it yet.

I am not inviting it. I don't want it. And I wanted better for him. Wanted someone who looked the same way at him, for him.

Not this sad girl.

Soberness might change my mind in the am. But i doubt it.

I forced our destinies. Apparently, I thought fate got it wrong.

To this day, I think I am his girl. Except that he had to find and live a life without me, one that is easier. One that is less complicated.

I will always hate that I feel like I had to let us go. Because that kind of love, is epically, amazingly precious...and rare.

I am glad that he made it out. I think a emotional suffering can directly equate to intelligence, so...I am glad he is with simpler, less broken, more appreciative creature now.

It doesn't change my grief, for the sweet, amazing boy, that I knew.