Wednesday, November 19, 2008

since no one reads this anyway, unless by accident

I might as well be my candid, unfiltered self.

It is looking like leaving Daniel really was the best thing I could have done for him. I knew that all along, and it depressed me. For years I told him I was too fucked up for him and he never wanted to hear it.

In a way it seems like leaving was selfless, in that regard. I am pretty sure no one will ever treat me the way he did, see the sun shine out of my ass or be able to handle my tumultous ways.

I am lonely and poor so I am out of therapy and seeking solace in ALL the wrong places. I am trying to be careful not to hurt anyone (but myself I guess)...so far I am succeeding at that...

...I think.

It's hard to know.

Hoping the depression passes soon.

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